Sunday, May 25, 2008

Geraldine Ferraro exclusive

Amid the uproar surrounding her criticism of Obama, Geraldine Ferraro has had little chance to catch her breath. Well, we caught up with the former Vice Presidential nominee to find out what she was really talking about.

a democrapublican: Congresswoman Ferraro, we understand based on comments in the press that you have a problem with how the Obama campaign has dealt with Senator Clinton's gender. Is this a fair statement?

Geraldine Ferraro: Yes, I have found the rampant sexism of Obama's campaign to be deplorable.

crap: Would you please cite an example?

Ger: For the better part of a year, Obama has been out on the campaign trail and has not once mentioned the fact that Hillary should be elected as the first female President of the United States of America.

crap: Ok?

Ger: Instead, he keeps making this ridiculous argument that he is the better candidate, without regard for the fact that Hillary should be elected as the first female President of the United States of America.

crap: That's some nerve.

Ger: I know. It's deplorable and misogynistic, to quote Senator Clinton.

crap: Yes, that's the word.

Ger: I implore Mr. Obama and the boys in his campaign to cease this disgusting practice of not campaigning for Senator Clinton to be the first female President of the United States. Otherwise, I will use my ever-expanding mouthpiece as a sane commentator to continue portraying them as the sexist old men that they truly are.

crap: Any parting comments for the voters out there reading this?

Ger: As Senator Clinton and I have been saying all along, please exercise your right to vote for the first female President of the United States. To do otherwise could only be motivated by the insecurity one feels at having been rendered impotent long ago by women like us.

crap: It's insidious. Thank you for your time, Congresswoman.

Ger: Please, call me Gerry, sweetie. *wink*

crap: This is awkward.

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